Saturday, June 27, 2015

10 things Indian parents say to blackmail you into marriage

10 things Indian parents say to blackmail you into marriage and how people like me react

1. "Sharma ji's son already has a son"
(in your mind) : “Damn that’s soo not his”

2. "We are growing old. We want to see our grandchildren before we die"
(in your mind) : "Ok.. but why do I have to marry for that"

3. "We want to get done with the responsibility before retirement"
(in your mind) : “.. so said Sharma ji too”

4. "What are you waiting for?"
(in your mind) : “for someone who isn’t crazy as me”

5. "There's never a right time"
(in your mind) : “then lets get a PS3 plzz !!!”

6. "The biological clock is ticking"
(in your mind) : “Nopes! Checked last Sunday.. batteries working fine”

7. "We have attended so many of our friends' children's wedding. It's our turn to host a wedding reception"
(in your mind) : “oh fcuk! Another bank loan”

8. "You don't have time to take care of yourself. You should get a wife"        
(in your mind) : “or a maid?”

9. "Your cousin went for a fancy honeymoon. You can also go if you get married"
(in your mind) : “Nopes! Checked last Sunday..  mine was better”

10. "We have done so much for you; can't you do this one thing for us?"
(in your mind) : “lets get a PS3”

inspired form an article in Hindustan Times :

Tuesday, January 27, 2015

The Modi'fying Idea

click to view in full size

Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Guitar Joys - Reshma Shiva

Now we always sing me and this Reshma girlie, she ofcourse being a professional and me ofcourse being a singer when no one is looking, we also play a musical instruments ..  she ofcourse plays the harmonium well.. and me ofcourse plays the guitar when no one is looking...  hmmm so we decided  we'l take this video, one of the few songs we like. also one of the few (watchable) videos we have .. rest of them i sing along!! so obviously people will be tortured if i put those up!  

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

12 kinda pics that Facebook missed!

Besides the usual selfies and all the other vibrant pics people upload these days, what really could fill Facebook albums of many, if Facebook existed earlier would be

Sunday, April 27, 2014

randomness part III

today surprisingly i don't have much work in life and i don't wanna watch a movie online or the IPL even though MI is playing with DD (Rohit Sharma just got run out). so i decided i shall write on this page and give my few readers another reason to like me from the bottom of wherever they like me from. (why am i writing in lower case? just! who reads my blog anyways?)

i just voted a couple of days ago - me observed a few things. 
  1. there is an option to vote for NONE ... i found that hilarious, it gives an unsure voter an opportunity to go and proudly vote for none and still avail of that discount in the bar by showing his inked finger and yet not feeling guilty while sipping on that free beer.
  2. the girly who inked my finger was either sleepy or mesmerized by my charm as she held my hand to paint my finger, she has designed something close to an S on my nail and it looks so untidy..  mmm u think she hated me cz i smiled at her ?? ah. id like to go with mesmerized still.  
  3. Mr.Ram Jethmalani says on the issue of many names, including his disappearing from the voters list that, only all intelligent voters were purposely not allowed to vote. but how can that be true!  my name was there. !! 
Manchester United won 4-0 yesterday against Norwich City as Ryan Giggs played we-are-out-anyways-why-the-fuck-dont-you-be-the-Manager. - me observed a few things
  1. when players play in their own positions they play much better. Mata played behind Rooney even if that meant he couldn't start, Kagawa, Valencia and then Young also held their best positions .
  2. not just me, even Giggs feels Fellaini is not needed in the club. Does Moyes take Fellaini wherever he goes??  ah .. just asking ..      
  3. Giggs may just win all 4 of his matches as Manager as no big teams are gonna play them in the remaining matches.   
  4. now that the club rightly chose to kick the the chosen one out, the next chap who gets chosen is gonna have his ass placed on a hot pan of pressure, expectations and fear of getting kicked out and humiliated.
have you heard of Modi Kurta ? did you knw Modi has a designer to design his kurtas for, different occasions where says the same things? a hindi news channel showed an entire 30 mins broadcast on shit like that, they also called him a new fashion icon in politics. may be now Rakhi Sawant would wanna showcase her silicon designs too, just to keep the competition going.

my Easter was good! i opted not to do the usual - midnight mass, then party (read as drink and dance) till morning, come home drunk, sleep till noon, hog and sleep again and then in the night realize wow Easter is over ? and i was sleeping ! so i went for morning mass, went for a drink with my best friend ball an spent the evening at home playing candy crush and enriching my overweight body with some delicious sorpotel cooked by mom.

speaking about candy crush i have been playing social empires on Fb lately and its kinda interesting .. you get to breed cows,sheep,horses, have villagers dig gold mines and u also get dragons and other creatures to build your own empire and screwup with others property.  yes i am 26 years old, computer science graduate, visiting lecturer at a college and i love that game. do you'll mind? *straight face* in my defense i can only say that its better than farm vile which people played like they were unfortunate Maharashtra farmers.

i am currently perusing a diploma in digital media marketing, its all about social media, and ways to promote yours/others businesses and make better use of social media sites other than bitching, dating, sharing crappy jokes, announcing the color of your undergarments, uploading pics/selfies that you think will make people like you, etc.  so in the process i have got myself a couple of clients -  Vineyard Bakes & Shrishti Holidays  - do follow these pages and get yourself some good deals, you'll may get some discount also ..